CAT'S SCAN
The Catster arrived yesterday.
Contents of suitcase - 2 packs of feminax (the rubbish new ones, but they are so much better than nothing), 2 old feminax tablets (wow - these things are like gold dust now - I could probably get a load for them on ebay if I didn't want them for myself. But they will have to wait for a very rainy day indeed), Tina Spoon (lovesick rag doll) , pre-ordered shark clothes and hula hoops.
Personally, if I had a suitcase full of such suspect oddities, I wouldn't have volunteered to go through the special full body x-ray machine with all my bags in order to queue jump at airport security just a little bit, but the catster is a fearless feline. She was therefore subjected to the tightest security checks it is possible to experience at an airport, and passed through sans probleme. Strange then, that on boarding the plane she then realised that she was accidentally still in possession of a cigarette lighter, having forgotten to dispose of it pre-security. Which makes one wonder, does it not? She arrived very excited that she could maybe pay for the price of her trip by selling her story to the papers, until I pointed out that as she had passed about 150 places where she could have purchased a cigarette lighter on her journey from the airport to my apartment, it might now be slightly difficult to prove.......
It was the Cat's birthday, so we then embarked on a downtown-uptown east-west marathon to collect the present I had ordered for her, drink lovely cocktails at the Rainbow Room and eat gorgeous food at Tia Pol, which has to be THE best tapas bar outside of Spain I've ever encountered. On the way there, cab driver Abraham introduced himself, shook our hands and recited his entire CV to us before starting to 'drive' (I use the term loosely). He then proceeded to bond with the Catster in a very alarming fashion throughout the entire 40 block journey (ie. without ANY hands on the wheel and FACING us in the back for 90% of the time). Had I been able to get a word in edgeways I might have sugested that he pay just a tiny bit of attention to the road, but the monologue about the entire works of Tom Hanks and Jack Nicholson, plus the non-career of Paris Hilton and various Dangermouse, Banksy spin-offs, left no second for interruption. He was so on a roll that he went 4 blocks too far before even noticing, and then wouldn't let us out until we'd heard his personal 9/11 conspiracy theory. This of course is how cab drivers in NY are supposed to behave, but only do when you're visiting the city. The last time I had an interesting cab driver was when CNL was visiting, and we were treated to a glovebox firearm viewing. If you live here, for some reason you only get the monosyllabic-in-another-language ones. But the Catster doesn't believe me of course. Maybe I will get to experience a NY vacation again too whilst she's around.......
Contents of suitcase - 2 packs of feminax (the rubbish new ones, but they are so much better than nothing), 2 old feminax tablets (wow - these things are like gold dust now - I could probably get a load for them on ebay if I didn't want them for myself. But they will have to wait for a very rainy day indeed), Tina Spoon (lovesick rag doll) , pre-ordered shark clothes and hula hoops.
Personally, if I had a suitcase full of such suspect oddities, I wouldn't have volunteered to go through the special full body x-ray machine with all my bags in order to queue jump at airport security just a little bit, but the catster is a fearless feline. She was therefore subjected to the tightest security checks it is possible to experience at an airport, and passed through sans probleme. Strange then, that on boarding the plane she then realised that she was accidentally still in possession of a cigarette lighter, having forgotten to dispose of it pre-security. Which makes one wonder, does it not? She arrived very excited that she could maybe pay for the price of her trip by selling her story to the papers, until I pointed out that as she had passed about 150 places where she could have purchased a cigarette lighter on her journey from the airport to my apartment, it might now be slightly difficult to prove.......
It was the Cat's birthday, so we then embarked on a downtown-uptown east-west marathon to collect the present I had ordered for her, drink lovely cocktails at the Rainbow Room and eat gorgeous food at Tia Pol, which has to be THE best tapas bar outside of Spain I've ever encountered. On the way there, cab driver Abraham introduced himself, shook our hands and recited his entire CV to us before starting to 'drive' (I use the term loosely). He then proceeded to bond with the Catster in a very alarming fashion throughout the entire 40 block journey (ie. without ANY hands on the wheel and FACING us in the back for 90% of the time). Had I been able to get a word in edgeways I might have sugested that he pay just a tiny bit of attention to the road, but the monologue about the entire works of Tom Hanks and Jack Nicholson, plus the non-career of Paris Hilton and various Dangermouse, Banksy spin-offs, left no second for interruption. He was so on a roll that he went 4 blocks too far before even noticing, and then wouldn't let us out until we'd heard his personal 9/11 conspiracy theory. This of course is how cab drivers in NY are supposed to behave, but only do when you're visiting the city. The last time I had an interesting cab driver was when CNL was visiting, and we were treated to a glovebox firearm viewing. If you live here, for some reason you only get the monosyllabic-in-another-language ones. But the Catster doesn't believe me of course. Maybe I will get to experience a NY vacation again too whilst she's around.......
posted by jazzshark at 8:48 AM
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